me and my teddy have a secret.

Tuesday, May 27, 2008 @12:00

i guess happy days at cold rock will be over soon.
something about cold rock isnt right now. which suck.
anyway, We will just continue being happy like this.. till the thing come.
we are all looking for new jobs.. those guys will just get employ by the government.

have been hanging out every night (fri, sat, sun) after work to talk to eat to share to complain.. what else can cold rocker do.. haha..

had a very emo closing.. everyone is thinking about the special someone..
and sigh.
I really hope that kind of closing never come again..
cos CRockers are suppose to be happy EVERYDAY..

oh~ its cos of White Chocolate chinese songs.. thanks!!!

Kat went off already, and we are still working here..
mm~~ the emo night is just US.. without any other ppl.. and I like that night..
just missing Amanda and Shu.. those crazy girls..
ah!! STOP IT GUYS!!!

clubbing that night was the BEST night so far..
the first time in my life that I dance none stop for 4 hours..
high after beers and sour apple..
gosh~ its nice.. and we are all deaf..
but those guys love dance behind me and ZY.. facing front somemore..
*sweat*
but... I suppose we had a wonderful time laughing at them..
cos.. its really fuunny.. i suppose some other people are laughing at us too..
so HECK CARE!!!

i rode on a bike yesterday..
it was fun.. I am so tempted to learn bike..
ssshhh~~ daddy will disagree??
but... i need transport at NIGHT.. late at night..
*haha*
i love cars but I can't afford now..

i think i work way too much this month..
till the AssM, ask me to cut my wrist and just end my life..
who the hell will tell me this? he is sick..
whatever ...

suffering from hang over too often..
till I'm so tired.. but I like it this way??
so I do not have extra time to think about stuff which doesn't exist..

sigh. i am emo.
very emo.
someone please don't save me.
decision is final... we will know how to solve it?
somehow..
i guess I will just stick to what makes me more comfortable..
and you too.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

@01:11

what I fear most, what I fear most...
it came... expected?
but why am I still so hurt?

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Wednesday, May 21, 2008 @00:58

.leave it.
.just leave it.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Tuesday, May 20, 2008 @11:06

as usual I will complain about work once again..
ARGH!!!! those assholes suck to the max.. *pissed*
they are rude, and RUDE and damn arrogant..
I am so not cut out to be in the customer service line.
i have no smile, no tolerance, no face to give to those Fckers..

some are nice, not in body but in mind.
I love to serve nice customers, and they can sample all our 24 flavors..
*haha*
oops.. if the bosses read this, I am so gonna get fired.

my timetable is so pack..
activities after activities after activities..
yesterday was great, cos I END WORK AT 7!!!
i still see alittle of the sun..
went straight to town for project discussion.. gosh~~
everyone is deadbeat tired.. *yawns*
but, HURRAY!!! we still got stuff done, which is
. W-O-N-D-E-R-FUL.

drop by Angeline's bday bbq...
hang there for awhile, and talking to wei wei.. as usual..
I will pull her along to show face, and cos she drives!!!!
*whee*
talking about that..
I FAMN FEED MY FRIVING LISCENCE FOON!!!!!!!

oright, due to work.. i missed out alot!!!
I am talking about the steamboat.. GOD!!!
hello!!! and please don't text me THAT kind of thing when im working..
gosh... GROSS!!!!!
*pooutttt* I also want steamboat!! with my GIRLS!!!!
how dare you all eat such wonderful meal without me...
PLAN ANOTHER ONE I TELL YOU!!!!

it's easier to say then do,
stop doing this, but your hands keep working.
tired, but still working so hard.
sometimes, I wonder ....
how much is enough?
I never seems to get enough..

I am alittle tired of life now, wth!
wondering why too.
nobody knows why, I don't know too.
the morning never seems like a morning to me, cos I still wanna sleep in.
the night is just a day without the sun, cos I will wanna sleep.
when my body gets tired, I just feel like giving up.

I am glad that I have my best buddy right there,
no matter what time, what day, what night.
when I feel so tired, when I feel so lost, she's there to reply to my boliao message..
even at like... 03:45
god !! I will just curse that person who message me. but I will do that kind of shit.
thankiew WEIWEI.. *hugs* I need you man!!!!
*haha*
ewww~~ gross.. but still have to say..

i am wondering what I want now.
is either I got too many things I am wanting,
or I have nothing I want.
when I smile, I am wondering, why am I smiling.
when I lapse into emo, why am I so emo again.
there are many things that is beyond my control.
there are many things that doesn't work the way I want.
there are many things ain't there when I needed it.
there are things that are meant to be put down.
there are things that are always going against my own will.
there are things that are too beautiful that it doesn't at all belong to me.
there are things that no matter how hard I work, its just not mine.
that makes me unhappy.
that makes me turn emo.

*sigh*
I want it to end right now.
cos I am tired.
cos I don't know how to do anymore.
i am lost. again.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Friday, May 16, 2008 @10:04

it is how weird life is.
it is how weird strangers can become friends.
it is how weird the heart link.
should I feel blessed about this weirdness?

things run through my mind every second.
and I get confused.

haha~~ I am kinda amazed by your SUPER cute reaction recently.
are you being sarcastic??

.but you are just so cute.
.in your own way.

I do not know what exactly i want.
but you are one of my wants.
what are my wants, I have no idea too.
sigh. working at cold rock is no fun without those guys!!
no more crap. no more joke. no more gossip.
serious work. hate serious work. *damn*

attract me with your beauty.
hold onto me with your hug.
drown me in your love.
lock me with your kisses.
never let go of me with that look in your eyes.
I want me to smell of you.
communicate with me with your heart.
mouth what you need out to me.
.i do not want to lose the feel of you.

.please let me stay in love with you.
.I do not want to be lost.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Wednesday, May 14, 2008 @23:20

you are so hot.
you are so cute.
you are so unexpected.
you are so unpredictable.
you are so lovable.

you melt my heart like the fire under the chocolate fondue.
you cause my heart to tangle up with that cute face of yours.
you always leave me lost for words with your most unexpected reactions.
you let me exprience new things everyday with unpredictable things.

have i told you lately

i love that smile of yours.
i love that eyes of yours.
i love that height of yours.
i love that chubby face of yours.
i love that sweet voice of yours.
i love that outfit of yours.
i love that look when you look at me.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Tuesday, May 13, 2008 @23:46

.I am tired.
.good night.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Sunday, May 11, 2008 @12:32

the fear of forgetting you is so overwhelming these days.
that explains why your face is everywhere.
do not where to start.
i do not wish to forget those days, those beautiful days together.
not knowing exactly what's wrong these days, but everything will be fine, really soon.

i just do not want to forget any part of you.
i just want to hold on to the past.
i just want to lock up all those memories.

please don't auto delete anything, the details. the dates.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

@11:14

hey mom, I am sorry that I can't be be who you want me to be.
I am a gay, and you are my mom.
it's a shame but I love the way I am.
happy mothers' day

eesh~ I am busy busy busy..
I am a gay now man.. *whee?*

have been hanging at Holland Village after work with the guys..
talk alot of shit and crap..
we love you customers *cross finger*

its time to start our fyp,
cos.. there are people we want to meet everyday!
*haha*

many many things to plan and stuff..

Coach is a BIG boy now!
he has got DICK!!
*WTF!!!*
looks gross.. but, he's my boy, shhhit~~
I still love you baby tho' you have dick.. muahaha..
if he knows how to read, i think he will wanna cut it off and be gay man.

I love you? I love you not?

I like being silly..
I like to anyhow..

do you like me like that??

.baby, I love you.
.i really do.
what to do?

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Thursday, May 08, 2008 @22:11

its coming to an end of the week..
and someONE out there is jumping for joy today cos the most miserable days are over.
*roll eyes*
our misery continues,

at this hour of the day, im still looking for a song for my blog,
mm~~ can't find anything nice.. GOD SHIT!

have been into business?
mothers' day stuff, ok.. boring stuff from morning till noon..
evening is the most wonderful time of the day.

have been home early for dinner, YEAH!!
just a something for mommy, cos I will be kinda busy for the next weeks..
the shit is producing while I'm typing this post.

*he's smiling.. thats how each owner sees their dog isnt it?*
coach has been an angel?
such a cute little dude, and I LOVE HIM LIKE MAD!!
who doesn't??

cam whore in school is just so fun.. i was wondering if FC6 have become a runway.. haha.. over dressing is just a problem?? mm.. shall not comment so much.. cos im no better.. but~at least, something to see and talk about?

having whole lot of fun with school mates..
having whole lot of fun with cold rockers..
i'm just wondering how will life be without all these people..
will i be a lonely arsehole, sitting at the stairs chewing on bread?
or just stuck in the library feeding my brain with food?
I am so blessed to have all of them in my this none interesting life..
*sigh*but all this wonderful time will end, one day.. or someday..
so I shall HURRY treasure it now. tho' it will be harder to let go if I spend more time with them, its better to be heaving bonded than to regret.

sometimes its so much better to not take so much things on yourself,
sometimes its so much better to not take things so seriously,
sometimes its so much better to not think so much,
sometimes its so much better to have your own little life,
sometimes its so much better to leave others alone,
sometimes its so much better to sleep away the time,
sometimes its so much better to don't care so much,
and everytime, its never easy to do those sometimes.

I think that you are the right one,
I think I want to spend the rest of my life with you,
I think that I can support your lifestyle,
I think that I am able to understand you,
I think that I can make you laugh everyday,
I think that you still love me,
I know that I love you.
cos,
I am releasing the rubber bend.
till the point that I am doubting if..
I still care for you,
I still love you,
I still know you,
I still understand you,
I still hold a place in your heart.

your position never change in my heart?
that day when i saw you..
I know that it didn't move an inch.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Sunday, May 04, 2008 @12:12

I was real forked up with those damn ang moh!
tho' there are MOST that are really nice babe and dude..
but a handful are just horrendously arrogant.. and think they're higher in status?
or bigger... in some where.. (get it or not?)

I hate customer service line!
damn those fucking arsehole.. aunties.. argh!!
sorry for my attitude.. but thats what you get when you are being an asshole..

it has been so long oready.. and I am so used to see those cold rockerss.. and the boys are going into army..
soon their hair will be gone.. *eesh*
there they go and I will miss them.. damn..
tho' we will go out quite often..
for bbq.. cycling.. and what not..
they are a bunch of cool dudes and babes...
pretty and handsome to a certain extent.. im talking about the personality.. really..

we work hard and play hard man..
the spirit of cold rockers..
supper is what we look forward after work..
bbq is what we do during off days.. we do exercise ok... *haha*
just to show that we are leading a HEALTHY lifestyle..
I LOVE COLD ROCK TO THE MAX.

projects starts piling up.. my time starts reducing..
damn life.. but still.. love it as it is..

oh goodness.. I haven't been shopping recently..
new clothes! new slippers! new bag! new this new that!
have been wanting to get lots of stuff.. like facial stuff.. hand lotion.. body lotion..whatever lotion.. whatever cream..
I'm starting to feel old...

pretty girls come my way!!
some are just bitch and I HATE them!
haha.. hate girls or hate bitch?
bitches are pretty girls with fucked up attitude..
but.. there are exception.. are you one of the exception?
*just some views from what I have witness*

alright.. daddy has been a nuisance recently..
he is asking me not to work ONCE AGAIN..
damn! I wonder how can I get my idea thru in words..
I need cash.. and he is saying as if he is providing.. alright.. he is!
but.. not enough..
i'm spending alot.. eh~~ so I need to earn?
or am I just trying my best to hit my 1million at the age of 26?
*haha*
sounds big.. but I am confident..
aim high and drop to the lowest high.. right?

when you start leaving everything behind,
and move on..
that's when you see new things, and accept new stuff with an open heart.

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy

Friday, May 02, 2008 @11:45

"hey, how's life?"

find this life familiar?
don't doubt it, yes.. this is what you always hear, see whatever it is.. on
msn, message, phone, email.. what else?
is this the only way to starts a conversation..
I suppose so, cos, I always do that..
and many others too..

"HEY! I'm fine!"
familiar too??
the SUPER common reply you will get after that question is asked.
haha..
yep, I'm one of them, its my tag.
tho' I am feeling FUCKING BLOODY NB-ing like shit..
human always don't speak their heart, do they?

.enough of this.

alittle about my life.
the fucked up life I am having now.is it really fucked up?
*think think*
not exactly.. haha..
just alot of porky(some will know what it means) people appearing..
the chinese acting like ang moh is just one of the horrible people on earth.
I can't stand CAN'T STAND!
with that kind of cocky attitude.. thinking that you are damn pro when you try to slang that english of yours when it just sounds like singlish?
WTF!

work has given me the "chance" to see all this "wonderful" people..
and I HATE THEM!

I am guilty that I curse and swear when the orders get too much! and the F word will just fly and somehow land on someone.. out there.
*oops* sorry!

Working my arse off is so much fun..
and I feel my fingers muscle growing.. after the 4 large take home in one order..
If it taste a little salty, don't blame me.. haha..
cos I DO SWEAT!!!

I really don't understand why people want to light the fire again when they are already full from bbq food?
just for the fun, and make yourself miserable? and fed up?
before saying a certain thing.. please think!
cos the words that is said might not mean anything to you, or rather means nothing to you,
but the person receiving it might feel something.

putting yourself in someones shoes is something everyone gotta learn.
cos, one is not ALONE on this planet..
if you want someone to treat you the way you want them to, then please treat them the way you want them to treat you.

does human tend to treasure something when you lose it? I suppose so..
mm~~ that is worth my time thinking..
I don't know whether is it true.. but I do treasure what I love.
seeing that it will stay with me forever..
but sometimes life is never the case. so I learn to let it be after so long,
it is never easy.
your attitude towards it might change, your treatment towards it might change. your thinking towards it might change.. human is always changing, isn't it?

cos things don't stay with you forever,
same goes to human.

.but I still wanna believe it does.
naive isn't it?

Yi got my secrets.
but; i only share it with my teddy